Chapter 2: Blur
“Here we are.” Gunn shut the engine off. “It’s smaller than what she used to live in, but after Hank left and Joyce died, she had to sell the house.
“I like it.” Faith admired it and smiled. “It’s quaint, good neighborhood, right next to your old place.”
“Whenever I come home to see Mom, I just visit Buff, too.” Gunn explained. “We gonna go in or are we gonna stand here all night.”
“Let’s go.” Faith took his hand and rang the doorbell. “I just hope she’s happy to see us.”
“Oh my God! Gunn, Faith!” Buffy hugged her old friends when she answered the door. “I didn’t know you guys were back in town. Is there something going on? Some party I should be aware of?”
”No. Umm….You’d better sit down, Buffy.” Faith suggested.
“Should I be worried?” Buffy asked as she followed Faith’s suggestion. “Charles, you’re freakin’ me out here. What the Hell is going on?”
“Buffy, Angel’s--” Gunn’s voice died down.
“Is he here?” Buffy’s face lit up. “Oh my God, he is. I knew it, I knew he’d come back to me!”
“Buffy, he’s not.” Faith interrupted and grabbed the blonde’s arm. “B, Angel’s getting married to Cordelia. They’re expecting a child together. I know that this is a shock, but…”
“No, no!” Buffy shook her head forcefully. “Angel doesn’t even like Cordy like that. They’re just old friends, ya know? You’re wrong, guys.”
“I’m sorry.” Gunn apologized. “I wish I had better news. She went to a doctor and everything’s legit. Cordelia is pregnant, Buffy.”
“No.” Buffy sobbed. “Charles, is this really happening?”
“I’m afraid so.” Faith hugged her friend. “I am so sorry, B.”
“Don’t, Faith.” Buffy shook her head and stood up. “That’s all he said when he broke my heart the first time. That’s all he ever said when he did something wrong. I hate those words. God, why am I still beating myself up over this?! We’ve been over for four years!”
“Buffy, I don’t know what else to say.” Faith sighed. “I’m just--”
“Don’t be.” Buffy cut her off and held up her finger. “Angel made a choice. Not a very good choice, but a choice nonetheless. Now I’ll make mine.”
“Buffy…” Gunn said. “Listen to me…” <
“No, Charles. Don’t try to tell me ‘it’s gonna be okay’ or that ‘I’m better off without him.’ It’s never gonna be okay!” Buffy cried. “I feel like my heart’s breaking into a million pieces right now and all I can do is watch it shatter. I just want to die.”
“You won’t, though.” Gunn spoke. “You’ll go on, find someone better. Someone who loves you with all their heart.”
“I thought I had.” Buffy wiped her tears. “Gunn, don’t make me out to be the innocent one, okay? I’m just Buffy Summers, graduate of U.C. Sunnydale. I hope you’re right. I want to find someone who’s deserving of me because Angel sure as Hell wasn’t. I deserve someone better… I’m sorry, Faith. I know he’s your brother. I just--I want to be alone right now.”
“Are you sure?” Gunn asked.
“Yeah.” Buffy nodded quietly. “Just leave me to do my brooding alone.”
“I’ll call you.” Faith hugged her again. “If you need anything…”
“I know.” Buffy nodded. “Just give me a little while to be by myself.”
Buffy walks them to the door. The couple hugs her one last time and drive off. Buffy shuts the door and falls to the floor, sobbing her heart out.
“Oh God, Angel!” she chokes out. “Angel!”