Chapter 12: Significance Of Insecurities
“Oh, god,” Buffy murmured as her eyes started to get droopy. “Willow…dead…Need…Angel…Help….”
She was fading, slowly, in and out, like the whole world was crashing down on her. She hadn’t been found in what could only be interpreted as days, and Willow’s body was still sitting boldly across from her, the rank smell of death and decay infiltrating her oxygen walls.
She didn’t have a very long time left, that she was sure of. It had been too long, and there was a very slim chance anyone would be rescuing her by now. Sometimes, these things were just supposed to happen, and even though she’d never envisioned herself growing old with the man she loved in a brick house with a white picket fence around it, with her grandkids all surrounding her, she never thought her death would have been spurned on by jealousy and rage.
She could feel her body slowing down, even though still craving hunger, and could feel her heart start beating slower and slower and slower. It wouldn’t be long now, and then she would be gone.
But she would be at peace, and she’d be with her little baby boy that she’d lost. Her son, Michael, the innocent angel she’d never gotten a chance to hold or even smile at.
And Angel could be happy, truly happy, with Cordelia, the way she always envisioned him with herself. She always thought she’d had the dream, a man she loved, a baby from that love growing inside her womb, a loving family, and wonderful friends….
But she’d lost everything that meant something to her when those doctors told her that her little baby boy had died.
And then Angel had left her.
He’d said that he’d always planned to, and that he just needed space, but she knew the real reason he’d taken off was because she’d lost their child, their little baby boy. Neither of them were ready to be parents, to raise a child, when they were practically still children themselves.
She’d been dependent on him for so long, for so many things, since her mother, granted she was attentive, had been too wrapped up in the messy divorce with her biological father to witness what was going on in her daughter’s life.
She didn’t see the late nights with Angel, the slow but steady decline in her grades, even the clubbing and all night parties with Faith. Nor did she see the skipping classes, or the excuses on why she wasn’t pencil stick thin.
No, Mommy Dearest never saw those reasons. She didn’t even come to her Prom to congratulate her daughter on being Prom Queen, and Buffy herself could barely recollect her being at her graduation.
Then again, it may have been because Joyce Summers liquored up when she was depressed or defeated. Buffy recalled distinctly on more than one occasion hearing about what an ungrateful bitch she’d been, and how she was a mistake that Joyce and Hank never planned on.
That’s why she was going to keep Michael after he was born, even if Angel had wanted to be a part of their lives or not. She wanted her little boy to grow up knowing that he had a mother who loved him, and who would give up anything just to keep him safe.
She remembered the day they put her baby boy in the ground. It was pouring down hard, and Buffy could still describe the heavy pitter patters to this day surrounding her. Angel stood by her side, albeit, but he couldn’t even look at her, and never made a single move to provide her the solace that she was desperately longing for.
And what he left almost a week later, Buffy knew in her heart, in her soul, that he was never meaning to come into contact again.
That’s why when Faith and Gunn came to her home in Sunnydale that night all those months ago, she knew in her heart and mind, that there was no going back. She couldn’t change anything, couldn’t make a difference.
Angel and Cordelia. Buffy still wondered if they were happy now, if they were making love at this very moment.
Would his hands caress her breasts like he did with hers? Would he leave soft trails of butterfly kisses down her body as he used to when they were intimate with each other? Or was his and Cordelia’s intimacy hard and fast? Did she like it rough, or better yet, did he like it that way? Was their short years of intimacy just a game to him, a means to an end, so he could be with the person who he truly thought as his soul mate, his precious Cordelia Chase?
Buffy shook her head from those thoughts. It didn’t matter now, none of it did. Her fate was to die young, beautiful, and utterly alone.
She leaned back in the chair, letting her head slowly come into contact with the cool wall of the factory. She closed her eyes, slowly, letting her mind try and find the satisfaction it had desired all these years.
The end was nigh, and Buffy was finally accepting the coming darkness, as all faded to black…
***
“Hello?” Faith yelled into the phone yammering in her ear.
She felt Charles’ arms wrap around her waist and leaned back into him, and listened to the person on the other end yelling in her ear. When she finally could make out the coherent ramblings of her phone buddy, she pulled instantly away from her boyfriend.
“What?! Are you serious? Where? Okay, we’ll be right there. Thanks, Lindsey.” Faith said, and hung up the phone.
“Who was that?” Gunn asked, kissing her shoulder.
“That was Lindsey, one of my Private Investigator contacts.” Faith explained as she rose from the bed. “He said that they received an anonymous tip a few days back from an elderly fellow who was walking past the old McHann factory a few days ago. He claimed he heard what he interpreted as a gunshot when he was walking past there about a week ago, around the time Buffy went missing. He didn’t really think anything of it until the other day, when he and a few other members of his Bingo club were walking past it again, and they smelled what he said reeked of rotting decay.”
“So, why didn’t anyone go check it out?” Gunn asked her.
“Because Linds hadn’t been in the office, and it was a temp who received the call, so he didn’t get it until tonight. He thinks it might be Buffy there.” Faith remarked, as she put on some decent clothes. “We need to get over there, Gunn. It’s been a week, and if Buffy has somehow managed to stay alive during all this, she’s probably weak and close to dying of starvation at the moment. We need to go, now.”
“Did you want to call the others, have them meet us there?” Gunn sighed, as he too followed suite.
“No, I don’t want to involve them in this in case I’m wrong.” Faith shook her head vigorously. “Let’s just get over there before it’s too late, okay?”
“All right.” Gunn nodded. “What if she’s…?”
“Then Cordelia better pray that someone murders her ass in that jail cell before I can get to her. This is all her fault, and I’ll see to it that she pays, one way or another.” Faith growled as she put on her jacket and grabbed her keys. “Let’s go Gunn. Time’s a wastin’ and from the way Lindsey sounded, we don’t have a lot of time as it is.”
***
“My god, no wonder why Cordelia would have Buffy end up in this part of town.” Faith said as Gunn drove to the factory. “Like anyone would ever come down here unless they had a damn good reason to.”
“Faith…” Gunn scolded.
“What? It’s true.” Faith rolled her eyes at him. “I know I would never have thought of Buffy being down in this area. Would you?”
“No, but we know her.” Gunn reminded her. “We know she’d never have come down here by herself at all, or would have at least called when she had. And if you truly believe that Cordelia did or was going to do harm to her, then I’m right along there with you.”
“Gunn, she’s guilty as sin.” Faith replied. “She wrapped my brother around her little finger by playing the “pity me because you got me pregnant” when he didn’t even get off at that. Hell, Cordelia has no credibility in my eyes, so she probably just got him drunk, and put him in her bed, to make it seem like they slept together. She’s a sick fuck, and I won’t let her win. And if something’s happened to Buffy….”
“Don’t you dare finish that sentence.” Gunn warned.
“Nice to know you were thinking the same thing, honey.” Faith rolled her eyes. “This looks like the place.”
“Are you sure?” Gunn questioned as he slammed on the breaks, parking the car.
“I’m sure.” Faith coughed after she smelled the air. “Well, the old man was right. It’s giving off the stench of death here.”
“You think she’s in there?” Gunn asked.
“I don’t know. Guess we’ll soon find out, won’t we?” Faith muttered as they busted inside.
Both of them coughed, the stench of death and decay infiltrating their noses. They could barely see, because the lights were so dim until you reached the far end of the factory.
“Why would Cordelia want Buffy here? If I remember her well, she’d never set foot in a place such as this. That girl is high maintenance at it’s best.”
“She wouldn’t, she’d have an accomplice do the dirty work for her.” Faith remarked.
“You’ve been watching too many cop shows.” Gunn chuckled.
“Oh my god.” Faith gasped, as they reached the far end of the factory. “Look.”
They saw Buffy, her body rigid and still; unmoving. Willow lay a few feet away, her body and blood surrounding her.
“Buffy!” Faith rushed to her friend’s side.
“Willow…” Gunn mumbled, moving towards his dead friend’s body. “Looks like you were right. It was her.”
“Buffy, wake up.” Faith shook her after she’d loosened her friend’s form from the ropes surrounding her. “Wake up, girl! Come on, we’ve all been waiting to find you, and now you’re here…Gunn! She’s not waking up!”
Gunn returned to Faith’s side, and tried to rouse their friend’s unconscious form. Faith started to sob when it came to no aid.
“We need to get her to a hospital.” Gunn sighed. “She’s probably lost a lot of her body’s functions to survive…If we don’t get her there soon…”
“No! I won’t let her die, Gunn! I won’t!” Faith bellowed at him. “Help me carry her, then.”
They managed to get her to the car in record time. Gunn, breaking all the rules in order to save his friend, found a local hospital about six to seven blocks away. They managed to get her into an operating room immediately, which didn’t seem to pose a problem for the doctors or nurses, who’d seen cases similar to this, mostly with drug addicts, such as cocaine users or people on heroin.
“She has to pull through.” Faith told him, her body shivering with chills, even though it was in 80 degrees outside.
“She will.” Gunn rubbed her palm and kissed her fingers.
“I have to call Angel.” Faith said, moving out of his reach. “He has to know…”
“Are you sure that’s such a good idea?” Gunn asked.
“Gunn, please don’t take the high road with me. Don’t make my brother out to be the badass while you make yourself to be the martyr of the group.” Faith scolded.
“I didn’t know I was.” Gunn shrugged, confused.
“So don’t argue with me, okay? Buffy was the only thing in the world to him, despite what you think. They were in love, until Cordelia came into my brother’s life and fucked things up for both of them.” Faith explained. “Excuse me while I call him. If you’d please call Fred and Wes, just to alert them what’s up. When and if Buffy wakes up, we can move further with the case.”
“Yes, sure. And what case?” Gunn inquired.
“Kidnapping, with intent to kill.” Faith said, as she dialed Angel’s number.
“Hello?” a groggy and sleepy headed voice answered.
“Hi Angel, it’s Faith.” she said into the phone. “I’m at the hospital…”